"We'll call it the South Harmon Institute of Technology!"

So there is a large amount of construction going on at my school. In a few years, there will be some beautiful, modern building designed to wow every prospective student that passes by.

But right now, there is a giant hole. At the current construction site, it literally looks like they may be digging for oil, or the Ark of the Covenant. The work seems endless. At any given spot on campus, you may hear jack hammers, cement trucks, chain saws... the list goes on. And you may look up and see a crane towering over your head. Today, I noticed something special about one of those cranes.

Using my hand as a visor to block the sun, I stood examining the crane, trying to determine why exactly it was in the spot that it was, when I noticed the company name painted on its side.

"JWP Erectors"

This was not a joke. JWP Erectors was not the result of some hilarious vandalism. No, this company neatly painted such a name onto their crane because they wanted to. Now think about this with me for a second.

First, let us imagine the genesis of this name. Picture a group of slezzy board members sitting around a table to discuss the name of their crane company:

Bob: Well, I think the name needs to be direct, to the point. Let's think of it this way Jim, what does our company do?
Jim: Why, that's easy, Bob! We erect things.
Bob: There you have it. We're erectors. We'll call the company JWP Erectors.
Jim: I like where you're head's at. High five.

This HAS to be the way it went down. Otherwise, someone might have pointed out that their name sounded more like a male enhancement supplement. Otherwise, they would have anticipated phone calls from guys for whom Viva-Viagra was just not viva-ing. If anyone in the board room had burst out laughing, they all might have forseen the issues with advertising. And they might have forseen people such as myself cracking up as I walked by one of their cranes.

Of course, it gets worse. Next to the name, there was a slogan, and it read:

"Sky's the limit."

These guys are erectors and the sky's the limit. Just think of a boner that reached the clouds. How hard would THAT be to tuck in?

Clearly, very little forethought was given to this company's image. No one took into account the associations the general public may have with the word "Erectors." I assure you, however, that the fine hard-ons at JWP are not alone. I believe this instance is one of many in which the goofballs with power come up with very unfortunate titles to represent their businesses. Sure, you can find a million examples on the internet. The website for the First Cumming Methodist Church is www.cummingfirst.com. And you've probably heard of Pen Island. You can order that specially customized pen for that special someone at www.penisland.com. But as I was reminded today, the examples can also be found in our everyday lives. Where I'm from on the Main Line, there is a towing company called the Main Line Hooker Service. If their listing in the Yellow Pages did not feature a tow truck, I might have placed a very misunderstood phone call. So keep your eyes open, and if you ever start up your own American-dream small business, remember the crane company JWP Erectors.